I’ve Got Fired! And I couldn’t be any happier!

Normally, the thought of getting fired would scare most, if not all, of us. Getting terminated is something we should expect when working as contractors, yet it is a risk I never really saw coming. Because why would I get fired, right?

When I initially took the job, I thought about all the possibilities I would have when working for this big company. It was a big deal. I worked for one of the biggest companies in the United States, which sells its products globally. So, this job was very important to me, and I had the perfect setup. By that, I mean that I was working from home, which I’d love to have the opportunity to do again. To clarify, I don’t want to work for the same company again but work at home for another company or, better yet, for myself.

As usual, in the beginning, everything was going well. I was getting to know all my coworkers, and my training was going as expected. I analyzed data, created reports, did lots of team meetings, and did all the office duties from the comfort of my home. In addition, I participated in big meetings covering international purchases and processes. Like, what’s not to love about that?

During the training, reports, and emails I was completing, I noticed how many of the processes weren’t fully explained. At times, finding the answers to certain things was sort of a “group effort” because no one “really” knew what to do even though they had done the job for years and years on end—other times, reading through what seemed thousands of outdated word documents concluded to nothing due to all the new technology added throughout the years. While talking to coworkers, I realized that the possibility of me getting promoted to a position of interest would be a matter of years because contractors like myself are kept with their current external companies to maintain the budget quota.

Being in this situation made me feel stuck. I was on a dead-end job even though I “wasn’t .” I felt like all hopes and goals for this company were crushed, and I was just starting. In dealing with this situation, I began to go out, looking for an outlet to distract myself from the thought of not going anywhere. As a consequence, I started missing training and waking up late. A lead tried to warn me, and although I started doing the right thing again, I still felt the same way: empty and lost.

So why did I get fired? It all came down to a confrontation with a trainer who reported me to the PM. During the confrontation, I was respectful, but she used all my previous mistakes to instill my lack of performance, ending up with an ultimatum where I couldn’t miss any other training. But I couldn’t pretend that nothing had happened without the PM knowing what she had said. So, I sent an email excusing myself for what had become my last training session and requesting a private meeting with him. As you may have guessed by now, that meeting never happened. That Monday morning, I was asked to log off and cease all operations. I was told that my lack of attendance had deemed me an unsuitable candidate and that my contract was terminated.

I was shocked. I was shocked that I didn’t get to explain myself. I wasn’t looking for the benefits of the doubt but at the fact that I wasn’t allowed to defend myself. But the most surprising factor was how relieved I felt when the phone call ended. As if I was liberated from a self-inflecting and excruciating punishment. I felt free.

Don’t get me wrong, the thought of how I will pay my rent next month did cross my mind. But even when thoughts of “How am I going to pay my bills?” and “How am I going to buy food for my dog and me?” or How am I going to pay the electric bill and the car repair’s cost?” I still felt glad. Happy. And for what? I didn’t have anything going for me. There was no backup plan. There was no saving grace on the horizon. I should have panicked, cried, or screamed, yet nothing but serenity.

So I went on a walk with my dog and thought, why don’t I take that trip I’ve wanted to do for so long? As a result, I took money out of my 401K and went to Las Vegas. At that time, Bruno Mars and the Silk Sonic residency was still on, and I wanted a quick, fun getaway. Afterward, I went to my cousin’s wedding in Puerto Rico, and while doing so, I began the process for another dead-end job that offered me paid trips around the world while keeping me afloat.

While working for my 2nd dead-end job, I began to ask myself what I wanted to do with my life. And most importantly, who am I? Is this what I envision myself to be? Would my nine-year-old self be proud of what I’ve become? What would that little girl tell me if she saw what I’ve done with our life?

So, I did precisely what she would have wanted me to do- I did exactly what I needed to make my dreams come true. I started by outlining my ultimate goal and breaking it down into smaller milestones. Then, I formed a detailed plan that would grant me moments of achievement by continuing to progress in a field that would open new doors in case I needed a backup plan.

Consequently, I got a new job, which was not a dead-end. I got a job in a field I like, which makes me happy. Keep in mind that although I’m ending this blog post on a positive note, my story “doesn’t” have a happy ending because I haven’t accomplished my ultimate goal. I’m a work in progress. But note that this post and my new job are my new beginning.